Tips For Parish Growth?

As I've sometimes pointed out here, I don't normally visit the Anglicanorum Coetibus Society blog. However, a visitor sent me a link to a post that was put up there yesterday that I think illustrates some of the puzzling viewpoints associated with laity who are enthusiastic about the Anglican evangelization project. For that reason, it's worth reproducing the post here, with my comments inserted in bold.

The following are 8 recommendations from what I have witnessed to work. This is how we are growing one Ordinariate parish so fast we can barely keep up with the building size

I ran this post by my regular correspondent, who is familiar with group size and building projects throughout the OCSP. My correspondent said, "Throughout the summer there has been a notice in the St George, Republic bulletin (available on their FB page) to the effect that they are outgrowing the 'humble chapel at Little Portion' and are at 'nearly standing room capacity on Sunday mornings.' This could mean 25 people; if you go to their website and wait for the picture of the chapel to scroll past at the top of the screen you will see that it is quite small and spartan. The Seraiah family numbers seven, and I think there are five in the Schaetzel family." All I can say is that the fairly recent photo here does show plenty of empty spaces in the pews.

1. Get away from established Catholic parishes. You can’t build your own house in somebody else’s backyard. Embrace the missionary spirit. Move away from your host parish and set up shop in a populated area where no Catholic parishes are nearby. Even if you have to meet in somebody’s home, or in a storefront, it’s better than trying to build your own house in somebody else’s backyard. My regular correspondent commented, "His parish-building points are clearly indebted to Fr Phillips," and I get some sense here that the same attitude noted by Abp Garcia-Siller, that there's a wish to be not just unique but separate, is in effect in Missouri as well. The problem is that a substantial number of OCSP communities do meet in diocesan facilities, and many of their clergy, certainly including Fr Seraiah, are dependent on diocesan assignments. The exhortation here is wildly unreal.
2. Get a good website and reliable contact info. Work your Google business listing for the highest visibility. Make sure people can easily find you. OK, but shouldn't the bishop be on this?
3. Behave like a parish. Make sure you’re offering mass and reconciliation regularly. Obviously, ditto.
4. Make sure you have a parish name — patron saint — don’t go by “Ordinariate Community…” Nobody understands what that means. Obviously, ditto. And where is this advice not being followed? Whom is Mr Schaetzel trying to impress?
5. Accept everybody, even cradle Catholics looking for a new home. Remember, people don’t have to be Ordinariate eligible to become members of an Ordinariate parish/community. Also, think outside the box when it comes to evangelism. If you’re only reaching out to Anglicans, you’re doing something wrong. You need to reach out to all non-Catholics. Remember, any non-Catholic (regardless of religious background) who is received into the Catholic Church through an Ordinariate parish/community is automatically eligible for Ordinariate membership as well. Here is where I'm really getting puzzled. Reach out to everybody -- cradle Catholics, non-Anglican Protestants, well, OK -- but St George Republic is one of the smallest groups. Mr Schaetzel doesn't mention how one might catechize these newcomers, which must be done before they receive sacraments -- is anyone among the two dozen or so at St George equipped to do this, especially for non-Anglicans? (See the California requirements for catechists in the link below.) What about newcomers who might be in irregular marital situations? Would these people even understand the problem they might have in a Catholic context? Would anyone be able to ask them tactfully about any of this? What would the local bishop have to say about offering a catechism program for all and sundry? But how many non-Anglicans have been confirmed there anyhow? Whom is Mr Schaetzel trying to impress?
6. Offer highly traditional liturgy. Youth are more attracted to tradition these days. Don’t fall for the hippy happy-clappy trap. Nothing is more dated than contemporary worship. If you want young people to join your community, you need to offer old traditional liturgy. The more “high-church” the better. So use that Divine Worship Missal regularly and vigorously. The only thing I'll say here is that Divine Worship -- The Missal is about the most recent liturgy you will find in the Church. Nothing "highly traditional" about made-up early modern English, any more than you'll find at the Renaissance Faire.
7. Offer challenging homilies. People today are sick and tired of watered-down, non-offensive homilies that don’t challenge them to live the faith. Don’t get me wrong. We need to show the love of God in all of our teaching, but at the same time we need to clearly define sin and challenge our people to overcome it. Maybe Mr Schaetzel could even suggest OCSP clergy take a short drive to a neighboring diocesan parish to get inspiration for good homilies. Just sayin'.
8. Don’t over-explain yourself. There is a tendency to want to explain the whole thing when it comes to the Ordinariate, Anglican Patrimony, our history, etc. Er -- isn't this called catechesis? Don’t do that. Just answer people’s questions as they ask them, and only give them the information they ask for. I don't understand. When do you mention the Church's teachings? Last I checked, the Catechism was 600 pages or so. They gave us a copy in RCIA. Don’t over explain it. That confuses average visitors and makes them think something is “fishy.” Just tell people what they need to know, only when they ask. Then carry on as if what you’re doing is the most natural thing in the world. I'm sorry, how does this differ from a cult? What I'm hearing is try to get just about anyone in the door, don't ask them questions, and if they don't ask any themselves, so much the better. Wouldn't many people, including Mormons, the unbaptized, Jehovah's Witnesses, and the like, be much, much better off in the care of a diocesan pastor and qualified catechist with far more experience dealing with the whole range of drop-ins?

This basically confirms my existing view of the Anglicanorum Coetibus Society, a small group of complacent -- even ignorant -- people far more concerned with grandstanding than anything of substance. The implication I see in these tips is that an OCSP group can grow by just kinda skipping over the Catholic business, putting plenty of distance between the group and the diocese, by finessing complicated stuff like catechesis, and by not asking, or answering, many questions at all. Clearly Ms Gyapong thinks this is a great idea. I wonder how the adults in the room feel about it.